Archive for the ‘ Guns and Weaponry ’ Category

Urban Homeless Problems: The Final Solution

In the spirit of a humane solution to an age-old problem, to solve this ongoing issue of Hobos taking over our city parks and sidewalks and business entrances (and what next?), I would like to proffer a proposed course of action with which I think everyone can get on board. This is particularly important with the ongoing Climate Change issues and less severe, milder winters we are experiencing, causing a reduction in seasonal transient migration to warmer climes, as well as milder summers in other areas.

To wit: The Citizens of our cities should be armed with “Hobo Guns”.

These pump-action or semi-automatic, brightly colored and festively adorned, low-powered air guns would shoot soft foam projectiles called TERDs (Transient Eradication Relocation Darts). TERDs would be colored brown so as to better fade into the background after employment and deployment, and made of non-toxic, biodegradable materials, of course. (a firmer foam dart can be made available to those with a less compassionate and empathetic proclivity, and desire to speed up the process)

A barrage of TERDs on a Hobo by a group of citizenry will surely be a gentle, but firm, suggestion that they relocate to other areas beyond your city. These will be referred to as “Nudgings”. Those citizens willing and able to take up arms against this Sea of Troubles shall be referred to as “Cleaners”. Perhaps these Nudgings can be accompanied by cheers of “Out, Damned Spot!”

After what can only be envisioned as a short period of time, all Hobos within your greater urban area will be non-existent and the proposed Action Plan will be proclaimed a resounding success.

I suggest the official name of this program be “HEP-CATS” (Hobo Eradication Program — Compassionate Anti-Transient System).

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An Openish Letter To Michael Moore

This is in ‘reply’ to MM’s ridiculous (seemingly increasingly undistinguished) content and message via his e-mail / blog post (?) saying that if ‘they’ released (or leaked) the photos of the children who were killed at Sandy Hook, that that would cause ‘something to be done’, because of how horrific they would be.

GMAFB!

If you can’t win your argument by intelligence, rationality, and logic, then do the next best thing: pander to people’s emotions, knee-jerk reactions, and mental weaknesses?

WADR, you are becoming increasingly irrational about your gun issues.

It’s unfortunate. There are much more, and many more, important things to think about and work on than this.

Of course, this issue is an “easy issue”. (for some; most of whom are irrational, illogical, etc., thinkers, believers, and behavers)

That’s not what we expect from you.

Sandy Hook was an ABERRATION!!

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